This is Oliver Pepper! I’m out of jail. Steven Steve Stephens married the beautiful deputy that he was in love with and was finally able to focus on my case.
I really didn’t have a case. My car, ted, that looks like this 
as you may have forgot, was normal on the outside, but under the bonnet or hood it had turned into a magical land of fantasy and fiction. Let me remind you of what happened.
“It looked as if I had opened the hood to find a mythical city. There was a waterfall where the battery belonged, Unicorns frolicked to and fro, there was a wizard sitting on a lily pad and of course there were Shruberbubery Trees. I blinked my eyes continuously, but nothing changed! I shut the hood repeatedly and still nothing changed. Ted, what is going on!??! Of course there was no response. I felt a rush of panic coming over me. I tried to keep my composure, but it was difficult as I was close to JFK, but now had a vehicle that had a magical land where the engine was supposed to be!”
I was arrested for not having papers to harness a level four village powering my Fiat.
I have been in this jail since August. It hasn’t been all bad, I meant a nice man by the name of Biff, another by the name of Butch. They were ok with me.
Anyway, Steven Steve Stephens, my attorney, had found a loop hole in the system for when your whole engine and parts that power your car turn into a magical land. It is a law in New York City, that if you are driving a Fiat on the way to Somalia and your working parts that power the car turn into a magical land, you are to be escorted by the National Guard to get on the plane to Somalia, because no one wants to go Somalia. So, forgive the Fiat and the fantasy under the hood.
So, yeah, I spent a lot of time in the clink. I think some people sort of forgot about me, it’s ok, it was the first time that I had been out of town.
So, I got to JFK. I was soon saddened by a misunderstanding that Ethiopian Airlines normally were scheduled to fly out of Washington D.C. Sadly, I have been and am in NYC. But, Steven Steve Stephens made some calls after his lust for the deputy was calmed he was truly a good asset.
Ethiopian Airlines was going to make a pit stop at JFK to fly me over to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. I would stay there for a few days and then be welcomed by hoards of excited people to Somalia!
I was excited to be out of jail and on my way!
There were eleven passengers on the flight, there were tourists. The had Hawaiian shirts on and maps flapping out of every suitcase, bag and pocket. They seemed to all know each other quite well. They didn’t really include me in the conversation. But, I was happy because they were excited and happy and drinking a lot of cocktails. The plane would have ran out of booze if the passengers themselves hadn’t have brought a half gallon of vodka a piece.
Their shirts looked like this:
Their booze they brought looked like this:
I didn’t drink cocktails I needed to stay sharp. I was busy eating antacids, aspirin, apples and apricots, washing it down with apple cider.
The plane looked like this
The trip looked like this!
We flew and flew. Hours went by, we were over the ocean for quite a while. It is 6932 miles from NYC to Addis Ababa, the Capitol of Ethiopia!
My co-passengers got pretty rowdy, telling crude jokes and farting. They didn’t talk to me. They made many comments about my mustache and my glasses. I didn’t mind, I find pride in both. But, if they would have talked about my FIAT! Look out!
I finally fell asleep, the flight lasted 14 and a half hours.
We touched down. I was in Africa. This was the view from my Hotel!
It’s been a long day, I will continue correspondence with you as soon as I am able.
Yours In Africa,
Oliver Pepper
